Your interests include rehab.

You're more flexible than I am.

You turn your selfie into pop art.

You pee upside down in public bathrooms.

You're tripping on acid.

You might steal my underwear.

You're a pizza.

You display your talent of chugging beers in the shower.

I like a guy who can multi-task, but this is "next level."

You're a self-proclaimed douchebag.

Thanks for the heads up, buddy!

You wear a 'banana hammock.'